A thirteen-year-old card

I received a friend request lately. The name is so familiar but I can't figure out who she is. I'm just glad there was a message: "Are you the Dorina May Beltran that I used to sponsor when I was 13 years old?" Wow! That was 13 years ago when I studied in a Christian school and all the students were sponsored from abroad to cover our imported school materials. She still remembered me! It reminded me as well of her photo that I still kept until now.

Later, we were able to chat via FB. Isn't it amazing!Then she started to talk about a bookmark that I made and sent to her. I knew that I sent letters, cards and photos but I can't remember specific things that I sent. She described it to me but I coudn't really remember. I coudn't even remembered if I could draw something. She's so clever of taking a photo of it and post it on FB.

13 years ago? A 13 year old card is still there! I was so touched that she still kept it and most of all she said that she always go back to it to read its message. If you look at the card, it's just a childish work of art but it matters when someone treasured it. I'm so proud of her. I can't explain the joy when someone value something that you gave even it's a tiny tiny thing. I've been keeping small gifts, hopefully, one day, I would make the gift givers proud of me of how I value their gifts.

Thanks, Jessica Amy! You're worth mentioning.

Most of all, it's a reflection also of the gifts that God has given to us. Sometimes we just forget to give value to them especially when they are just small. It's a good reminder also to treasure every gift we receive from the Lord. One day, He will smile and be proud to say that we are good stewards of all His gifts.

A Friend Who Left Forever

I was there in their first glimpse of each other. I was one of the first few people who knew when they started their relationship. I witnessed how they love each. I shared with their joys and prayed with them in their trials. They made me a part of their lives. I was there when they exchanged vows for each other, at that time,it seems it's forever. I was even overjoyed to hold and cuddle their little baby.

On the other hand, they were a brother (Kuya) and a sister (Ate) to me when I was at the university. I can just call them any time and they were there for me. She was a roommate and in many ways a mentor. He was an adviser and just came up with something to make me smile when I was sad. They made my birthdays special away from home. Most of all, they were one of the those who encouraged me to pursue my calling especially the time when my church didn't have a pastor and the church didn't have much understanding of my calling. I vividly remembered when they sent me off to the pier when I went for my missionary training.

We separated ways with fond memories and pursued each of our calling. We have lost touch for a while.

Just this week, a news broke my heart. He is gone by taking his own life leaving her behind with a child. I was so shocked and in grief. So many questions but few are answered. It seems that no one wanted to speak about it.

I wanted to be there to see his face for the last time and be there for her in this sorrowful moment. I'm not sure if God will permit.

It has been always hard for me to leave friends or when friends left for a while for various reasons but now it's even harder, a friend and a brother in the Lord left forever.

Things may be unclear this time, I am just living with the assurance that everything happened with a purpose and in His time things will be revealed clearly.

I just pray for comfort not only for me but also for her and the rest of the family and for friends who are also in grief with this shocking and sudden incident.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28

My Empty Pigeon Hole

It has been a habit of all missionaries to go straight to their mail boxes which we call "pigeon hole" every time we come to the team center to see if there are mails or parcels. Most of the time, for a while now, there's nothing interesting everytime I drop by my pigeon hole. There's nothing in there except language lesson bills...whew!

But not today! Unexpected surprise parcel was found in my pigeon hole from someone that I just chatted once but became a blessing and who inspires me to enter into the world of blogging (I'm trying!). From someone who cares even she doesn't know me that well. I don't know what to say but I was so touched and encouraged by her thoughtfulness.

Thanks a millon, Ate Beng!

Lost as an executioner, found as Christ's soldier

As I was browsing through the library books, my eyes were caught by a book “The Lost Executioner”, a story of Pol Pot’s chief torturer known as Duch. He was responsible for the murder of more than 20,000 among the 1.7 million deaths during the Khmer Rouge. Twenty years later not one of the Khmer Rouge member had been held accountable and Duch has disappeared, nowhere to be found leaving the survivors in anger, pain, and hopelessness. A photographer was obsessed in finding Duch in search for answers to the secret and brutal mass killing. Indeed, he didn’t fail. By chance, he came face to face with him. Yet he found him not as a Khmer soldier, an executioner but as Christ’s soldier- a changed man who is a zealot of his faith.

Duch was imprisoned since 1999 and now at the age of 66 he is facing a trial with some others in court. Recently, his story was on the newspaper. It so amazing that during the time that he was nowhere to be found he met the Lord Jesus. May he be like Paul who met the Lord on the way to Damascus and changed his life that made an impact in the lives of so many people.

This is such an incredible evidence of God working in the lives of the Cambodians. When the trial started there are a lot of reactions from the Khmer people especially the Khmer Rouge survivors, some reacted in rage, pain and at the same time relief that at last they will have justice. My Khmer teacher said, “What good will it bring to us now? We lost our families, land and everything, the damage has been done!” Still others said that Duch becoming a Christian is just a political move.

I just pray that this trial will start to bring healing and restoration, that as Duch's has confessed to God his sin, he will also be willing to confess his sin to the Khmer people and willing to accept the consequences and that faith will impact in people's lives and God's glory will be revealed.

This is another story about God's amazing grace!

Duch on his first trial recently

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins
and purify us from all unrighteousness.”
I John 1:9

Made For a Mission

I was born into a Christian family , my parents are church planters for more than 30 years now. I was dedicated to the Lord by my parents even I was still in my mother’s womb. No wonder that an early age the Lord has called me into His ministry. I committed my life to Christ at the age of seven and since then I served the Lord in anyway I can.

I was involved in different ministries since I was a child until at the age of thirteen, I sensed God’s call to missions to unreached peoples after I went on a summer mission trip. I did not know how, when and where to go. I started in my own Jerusalem until the Lord brought me to many places in the Philippines to serve Him. I went on some mission trips to different tribal people groups. I was also involved with Island Outreach Ministries, Child Evangelism Fellowship, Teen Missions Int’l, Student Life Ministry (SBC) and Campus Crusade for Christ. Later in my college years the Lord has led me to go beyond my Jerusalem even to the ends of the earth which led me to a missionary training at Bible, Missionary and Work Training Center (Teen Missions Int’l ) right after I finished my Bachelor of Arts in English to be fully equipped for His service.

Now, the Lord has brought me here in Cambodia. Almost done with my full time language which is quite a challenge yet I can see how the Lord has guided me in every lesson and He's been with me through my adjustment and through all the situation that I am facing. Youth has always been my passion and right now, I'm praying for opportunities to do youth ministry after my full time language study.

Life is not so easy. I miss my family, friends and things that I'm used to have and to do back home.I don't know what lies ahead of me here but one thing for sure I know who holds the future. May the Lord use me to make an impact in the lives of the youth of Cambodia!

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?” And I said, “Here am I, Send me!”
Isaiah 6:8

Amazing Grace

Once there was a mother who conceived her second child. She loves the Lord so much that she dedicated her child to the Lord from the moment she conceived it. Sadly, she was so sick that she has to take high dosage of medication just to get well. Her husband has to sign a waiver indicating that the doctor is not liable to whatever happens to the baby every time she's given a medicine or injection . It was difficult for them but there wasn't much of a choice.

At last, the baby girl was born and when the father saw the baby he turned his face away from the baby in disappointment. With a big bump on her head, with wrinkled skin, and just an ugly appearance the doctor told them that the baby is abnormal and they have to take her to a specialist. Because of the lack of resources they were not able to see a specialist but instead they got down on their knees and ask for a miracle. With that the father said, "No matter what she looks like and what will she become, we'll still love her."

Two months later, the father exclaimed looking at the baby, "Amazing grace! Amazing grace!" The bump on her head was gone, her skin was so smooth, her appearance changed into a beautiful baby. She was then named "Amazing Grace" in her childhood. Her appearance is now normal, the next question is her brain...will she be able to talk, walk, play, live like most normal children do and later go to school, decide for herself....do things like normal people do...? Later they knew that she could have been a hydrocephalic child.

Well... amazingly, she's writing this amazing story of hers continuing to experience God's amazing grace every single moment of her life.

Without His amazing grace I won't be here typing with my own hands on this keyboard in a far distant nation joining this amazing race in life as Paul says, "let us run the race with endurance God has set before us"(Hebrews 12:1).

Join me in running this amazing race! On the way there will always be trials, we might fall on the road, get hurt and have bruises ( which literally I had) but the reward is also amazing that you could never imagine.

I want you to experience His amazing grace too!

"Amazing grace how sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me...
I once was lost but now am found
Was blind but now I see"
(John Newton)